Making Our Kids Feel Guilty About Saying ‘No’ Is Never Okay
Here’s the thing… it is okay for our kids to say, ‘No’ to hugs and kisses. After all, a child’s body is their body and they are the boss of it. So When Auntie Jeanie or Grandpa Bob comes in for that big smoochy kiss or that crushing bear hug, it is absolutely fine for your child to say, ‘No’. In fact, both Auntie Jeanie and Grandpa Bob need to be educated in this space. They need to know that asking your child’s permission for a kiss or hug is a necessary requirement. It is not okay for the ‘said...
Making Our Kids Feel Guilty About Saying ‘No’ Is Never Okay
Here’s the thing… it is okay for our kids to say, ‘No’ to hugs and kisses. After all, a child’s body is their body and they are the boss of it. So When Auntie Jeanie or Grandpa Bob comes in for that big smoochy kiss or that crushing bear hug, it is absolutely fine for your child to say, ‘No’. In fact, both Auntie Jeanie and Grandpa Bob need to be educated in this space. They need to know that asking your child’s permission for a kiss or hug is a necessary requirement. It is not okay for the ‘said...
Don’t Tell Me I’m Pretty, Tell Me I’m Smart
‘Don’t tell me I’m pretty, tell me I’m smart … and funny, artistic, kind, loving, friendly, unique, strong, fierce and clever. I am so much more than pretty.’ When relatives or family friends are introduced to a young girl, they will often open the conversation with something like this ... ‘Hello! You look pretty today. Your dress is beautiful.’ Don’t worry, we are all guilty of it; but by focusing only on a young girl’s physical appearance, what we are actually saying is this is what society values most about you. It is important for us to shift our focus...
Don’t Tell Me I’m Pretty, Tell Me I’m Smart
‘Don’t tell me I’m pretty, tell me I’m smart … and funny, artistic, kind, loving, friendly, unique, strong, fierce and clever. I am so much more than pretty.’ When relatives or family friends are introduced to a young girl, they will often open the conversation with something like this ... ‘Hello! You look pretty today. Your dress is beautiful.’ Don’t worry, we are all guilty of it; but by focusing only on a young girl’s physical appearance, what we are actually saying is this is what society values most about you. It is important for us to shift our focus...
Children's Books with a Difference
As a teacher, writer and mother I am devoted to the education of children. However, it is not their academic achievement that I am so focused upon. What is important to me, is that children: • develop emotional and social intelligence • are educated in age-appropriate Body Safety • understand the terms ‘respect’ and ‘consent’ • know gender equality is non-negotiable. These are the reasons why I write the children's books I do! Children are visual learners and what better way for them to talk about these important topics than through story. I write both fiction and non-fiction texts, and...
Children's Books with a Difference
As a teacher, writer and mother I am devoted to the education of children. However, it is not their academic achievement that I am so focused upon. What is important to me, is that children: • develop emotional and social intelligence • are educated in age-appropriate Body Safety • understand the terms ‘respect’ and ‘consent’ • know gender equality is non-negotiable. These are the reasons why I write the children's books I do! Children are visual learners and what better way for them to talk about these important topics than through story. I write both fiction and non-fiction texts, and...
12 Confronting Child Sexual Abuse Statistics All Parents Need to Know
As a parent and an educator I find the statistics below both confronting and horrifying. However, they do highlight the reasons WHY we need to teach the children in our care Body Safety from the earliest of years. Such age-appropriate knowledge is empowering for children, and might well be the difference between a child becoming one of these statistics or not. As an advocate for Body Safety Education in both homes and schools, I have heard many sad and crippling stories from adult survivors; but it’s this one shared comment that stays with me, “If only I had known from...
12 Confronting Child Sexual Abuse Statistics All Parents Need to Know
As a parent and an educator I find the statistics below both confronting and horrifying. However, they do highlight the reasons WHY we need to teach the children in our care Body Safety from the earliest of years. Such age-appropriate knowledge is empowering for children, and might well be the difference between a child becoming one of these statistics or not. As an advocate for Body Safety Education in both homes and schools, I have heard many sad and crippling stories from adult survivors; but it’s this one shared comment that stays with me, “If only I had known from...
What is Body Safety Education?
Body Safety Education (aka sexual abuse prevention education) aims to empower children with skills and knowledge that will lessen the likelihood of them becoming victims of childhood sexual abuse. In summary, Body Safety Education teaches children: the correct names for their private body parts the difference between safe and unsafe touch not to keep secrets that make them feel bad/uncomfortable what to do if they are touched inappropriately general assertiveness — especially in relation to their own body. For a more in-depth coverage of Body Safety Education go to Jayneen's book 'Body Safety Education: a parents' guide to protecting kids...
What is Body Safety Education?
Body Safety Education (aka sexual abuse prevention education) aims to empower children with skills and knowledge that will lessen the likelihood of them becoming victims of childhood sexual abuse. In summary, Body Safety Education teaches children: the correct names for their private body parts the difference between safe and unsafe touch not to keep secrets that make them feel bad/uncomfortable what to do if they are touched inappropriately general assertiveness — especially in relation to their own body. For a more in-depth coverage of Body Safety Education go to Jayneen's book 'Body Safety Education: a parents' guide to protecting kids...
Giving Kids a Voice at Christmas Time
Christmas is a crazy time of the year. Relatives and friends will be coming and going, things will become hectic, and your kids will be a huge part of this exciting mix. However, two very important things to consider before things get really busy, you’re distracted and the kids are off … somewhere! 1. Prior to the Christmas/holiday rush, discuss with your child how they might like to greet family and friends in a way that makes your child feel comfortable. Remember, it may have been years since they have seen people, or they may have never met some family...
Giving Kids a Voice at Christmas Time
Christmas is a crazy time of the year. Relatives and friends will be coming and going, things will become hectic, and your kids will be a huge part of this exciting mix. However, two very important things to consider before things get really busy, you’re distracted and the kids are off … somewhere! 1. Prior to the Christmas/holiday rush, discuss with your child how they might like to greet family and friends in a way that makes your child feel comfortable. Remember, it may have been years since they have seen people, or they may have never met some family...
Why You MUST Teach Kids Sexual Abuse Prevention Education
1. 20% of girls and 8% of boys will experience childhood sexual abuse before their 18th birthday (Fergusson & Mullen, 1999; NSW Commission for Children & Young People, 2009). 2. Approximately 95% of sex abusers are known to the child (NAPCAN 2009). They will be amongst your family, friends and the community. Remember sexual predators groom both YOU and YOUR CHILD. 3. The most vulnerable age for children to be exposed to sexual abuse is between 3 and 8 years with the majority of onset happening between these ages (Browne & Lynch, 1994). It is NEVER too early to start...
Why You MUST Teach Kids Sexual Abuse Prevention Education
1. 20% of girls and 8% of boys will experience childhood sexual abuse before their 18th birthday (Fergusson & Mullen, 1999; NSW Commission for Children & Young People, 2009). 2. Approximately 95% of sex abusers are known to the child (NAPCAN 2009). They will be amongst your family, friends and the community. Remember sexual predators groom both YOU and YOUR CHILD. 3. The most vulnerable age for children to be exposed to sexual abuse is between 3 and 8 years with the majority of onset happening between these ages (Browne & Lynch, 1994). It is NEVER too early to start...
Empowering Tweens, Teenage Girls and Young Women
As parents we want our girls to grow up confident, with an amazing sense of self-worth, a whole lot of resilience and respect for others and the world around them. In a world where gender inequality is still a major issue and sexual harassment of young girls is beginning younger and younger, we need empowered daughters. There is no easy fix for this, but as a mother of three young women here are a few suggestions. 1. From a very young age educate your daughter to understand her body is her body, and that people must respect her personal body...
Empowering Tweens, Teenage Girls and Young Women
As parents we want our girls to grow up confident, with an amazing sense of self-worth, a whole lot of resilience and respect for others and the world around them. In a world where gender inequality is still a major issue and sexual harassment of young girls is beginning younger and younger, we need empowered daughters. There is no easy fix for this, but as a mother of three young women here are a few suggestions. 1. From a very young age educate your daughter to understand her body is her body, and that people must respect her personal body...
Body Safety ‘What Ifs?’ for Kids
After children have been taught their Body Safety Rules, ask them these ‘What If?’ questions to reinforce the safety messages learnt. What if? What if someone asks to see your private parts? You know: Your body belongs to you and your private parts are just for you. Say: No! My private parts are just for me. Action: Tell one of the adults on your *Safety Network straightaway. If they don’t believe you, tell another adult on your Safety Network. What if? What if a person tells you to keep a secret that makes you feel uncomfortable and unsafe?...
Body Safety ‘What Ifs?’ for Kids
After children have been taught their Body Safety Rules, ask them these ‘What If?’ questions to reinforce the safety messages learnt. What if? What if someone asks to see your private parts? You know: Your body belongs to you and your private parts are just for you. Say: No! My private parts are just for me. Action: Tell one of the adults on your *Safety Network straightaway. If they don’t believe you, tell another adult on your Safety Network. What if? What if a person tells you to keep a secret that makes you feel uncomfortable and unsafe?...
10 Top Tips to Empower Kids
As parents we want our kids to grow up confident, with an amazing sense of self-worth, a whole lot of resilience and respect for others and the world around them. As adults, we know persistence and tenacity are important traits when the going becomes tough. Children are a blank slate when they are born. It is a scary thought, but in the early years, children will become what adults tell them they are. I have seen this both as an educator and a mother. The child who is told they are stupid and worthless will believe that is what they...
10 Top Tips to Empower Kids
As parents we want our kids to grow up confident, with an amazing sense of self-worth, a whole lot of resilience and respect for others and the world around them. As adults, we know persistence and tenacity are important traits when the going becomes tough. Children are a blank slate when they are born. It is a scary thought, but in the early years, children will become what adults tell them they are. I have seen this both as an educator and a mother. The child who is told they are stupid and worthless will believe that is what they...
A Teenage Girl's Guide to Empowerment
1. Embrace your uniqueness and ignore anyone who tries to shame or bully you about your appearance. We all have a body and each body is different. Love yourself. 2. Do not slut-shame* other girls. Support each other. Women face many expectations from a male-dominated society. Lift each other up to fight gender inequality. 3. Pornography is not real. It is not what a loving respectful relationship looks like. What you may have seen are two or more actors. Even though the woman appears to enjoy sex that objectifies and degrades her, in real-life this most likely is not the...
A Teenage Girl's Guide to Empowerment
1. Embrace your uniqueness and ignore anyone who tries to shame or bully you about your appearance. We all have a body and each body is different. Love yourself. 2. Do not slut-shame* other girls. Support each other. Women face many expectations from a male-dominated society. Lift each other up to fight gender inequality. 3. Pornography is not real. It is not what a loving respectful relationship looks like. What you may have seen are two or more actors. Even though the woman appears to enjoy sex that objectifies and degrades her, in real-life this most likely is not the...
Tips to Promote Gender Equality in Your Classroom
As classroom teachers we have an ideal opportunity to encourage gender equality and respectful relationships in our classroom through very simple but effective practices. Research tells us in order to reduce gender-based violence we need to teach these skills to children from the earliest of years. Our differences make us unique but it is our ‘sameness’ that makes us human. The message we have the opportunity to promote in our classroom is that no matter what gender we are, we all have hopes and dreams, and we all need to treat each other with respect and dignity. No gender is...
Tips to Promote Gender Equality in Your Classroom
As classroom teachers we have an ideal opportunity to encourage gender equality and respectful relationships in our classroom through very simple but effective practices. Research tells us in order to reduce gender-based violence we need to teach these skills to children from the earliest of years. Our differences make us unique but it is our ‘sameness’ that makes us human. The message we have the opportunity to promote in our classroom is that no matter what gender we are, we all have hopes and dreams, and we all need to treat each other with respect and dignity. No gender is...